


Finding Thoughts

by Kissinstylinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Amnesia, Bottom Louis, Harry Styles - Freeform, Larry Stylinson Is Real, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, Louis and Harry - Freeform, M/M, Married Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Top Harry, harry - Freeform, larrie, larry - Freeform, larry stylinson - Freeform, louis - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-26
Updated: 2016-09-26
Packaged: 2018-08-17 12:13:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 6,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8143618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kissinstylinson/pseuds/Kissinstylinson
Summary: "Hi, my name is Louis Tomlinson and I suffer from short term memory loss."





	1. Prologue

Drowning

Drowning

Drowning

And he can't swim his way back up.

Because he doesn't remember how to.

Louis was only eight years when his father, his stupid fucking father, decided to drive high. He almost killed Louis, almost, but instead, he took away the ability to remember. Sometimes Louis wishes is life was the one that ended. He remembers the drink his father had that day, he remembers the stuffed animal he was holding in the back of the car, a little elephant he called Henry. But what he didn't remember was his apartment number, where he had to be led everyday by the receptionist. He felt like he was drowning, and he didn't exactly object to it.

Louis ran up the stairs of his apartment building, he'd have to find his apartment on his own, the receptionist wasn't there when he got home. Louis started to panic as he walked around the hallways, not knowing where to go. Louis ran into a man, making him fall to the ground. "Oh my god, are you okay?" The man helped Louis up and looked into his beautiful blue eyes. "Can you please help me, I can't find my home and I'm really scared." Louis gasped out in complete panic. "Hey, hey calm down. If you live here why don't you know where your apartment is?" Louis looked around in a state of confusion and panic, mumbling out a few 'ums' as he tried to remember. "I um, I have short term memory loss, I'm so sorry I'm stupid I forget everything." Louis covered his face and tried not to cry.

"No, love it's okay I'll get you home. Can you show me your keys? They have your apartment number on them." Louis nodded frantically and pulled out his keys, handing them to the stranger. The man looked at the keys, finding the room number. "You're in number two-hundred-seventeen, I'll take you there love." He said in his beautiful, Cheshire accent. He grabbed onto Louis' hand and walked him down the long hallway.

Louis coughed awkwardly as they reached his apartment and the man unlocked the door for him. "So um, what's your name?" He turned to Louis, handing back the keys. "My name's Louis." The man smiled. "I'm Harry."

That was a year ago.


	2. One

To put it simply, Louis was a mess without his Harry, he didn't know how to cook, so he often ate fast food which made him put on a lot of weight and the food was just unhealthy in general. Harry made sure he didn't have to eat how he used to. Harry would gladly teach things to Louis a million times until he found a way to remember, which was usually little notes Harry wrote and left all around their small, one bedroom apartment. To Louis, Harry was the best boyfriend ever, well he thinks so, considering he can't remember if there were any others besides Harry. Louis seemed to be improving his memory everyday, even if his doctor said what was done was irreversible, Harry was confident that Louis would get better.

"Harry!" Louis shouted from the bedroom. "Harry come here there's a- there's a-!" Harry could tell Louis was trying to figure out exactly what was there, something he did quite often. However, Harry stood and walked to their room, where Louis was sat on the bed watching a small red creature crawl on the wall. Harry laughed and walked over, ushering the small bug into his hand. "It's a ladybug baby, it's not gonna hurt you." Harry kissed his forehead then opened the window, letting the tiny bug fly free. "What are you watching sweetheart?" Harry asked, wrapping his arms around his small boyfriend and looking down at the netflix open on the screen. "I um." Louis coughed. "I forgot." Louis looked down in shame. "Hey babe, don't worry about it. You know it isn't your fault." The boy nodded and packed Harrys lips. "What would I do without you?" Louis whispered.

"I dont know love, I don't know."

-

Louis laid in their bedroom with some sad music playing, his only real, clear memories were from his childhood, which was probably why he wishes he had long term memory loss. So he could forget his fathers alcohol problem, and the accident that changed his entire life. Harry walked in and noticed the tears rolling down Louis' cheeks as he remembered his past. "Hey, Louis sweetheart stop thinking about it. If you keep thinking about it you'll never forget it." Louis sat up and turned to his boyfriend. "You know, I don't want to forget because these memories are the only ones I have and if I lost them, I'd go completely mad. It's just too bad that I forget everything I really want to remember. I'm such an idiot." Harry shook his head and grabbed Louis' smaller hands. "No baby you're not stupid, remember what I told you? You're my Dory and I'm your Marlin, and we just gotta keep swimming." Louis smiled and pressed his lips to Harrys. "Just keep swimming." Louis whispered.

The two cuddled in their bed, Louis mostly watching Harry go through his phone and do things, Louis didn't have a phone, since he would never be able to properly remember how to use one. "Harry?" Louis looked up at the man. "Yes baby?" The small boy cleared his throat. "Do you ever want us to get married, I mean like after my memory gets better because I don't wanna forget my wedding day but is that something you wanna do?" Harry started at him with a shocked expression. "Of course I'd want to marry you baby, I am positive I will spend the rest of my life with you." Louis smiled cutely and laid his head on Harrys chest. "I love you so much."

"I love you, my little Dory."

Louis laughed at the name. "Is that a thing now? I'm Dory now? When did that start." Louis smirked and started to play with Harrys hair. The man sighed. "I just think it's cute, because Dory has short term memory loss, and you do too, so you're like my own little Dory." Louis poked Harry in the stomach. "I'm not little." He pouted, pulling the hood of Harrys sweatshirt (which he was wearing) over his head, as it flopped down to his nose, Harry laughed loudly. "You're actually drowning in my sweater and you're saying you aren't little." Louis huffed. "Maybe you're just a giant! Hazza the big mean giant. You're such a meme, you frog bitch." Harry gasped, placing a hand over his chest and pretending to be offended. "Ouch, my ego." Louis let out a high pitched giggle as Harry started to tickle him. These were Harrys favorite moments, If only Louis could remember them.

-

A/N  
Sorry it's short, this story has a plan and the first chapter is just kinda filler.


	3. Two

Louis rested his head on the window of the car as Harry drove him to the doctors office. He had to go once a month to make sure his condition wasn't getting worse. "Harry, I hate these appointments, the doctor is annoying and asks stupid questions, like not bitch I don't remember what I ate last night, many it was a nice hot plate of dick." Harry laughed loudly. "Oh my god, baby you're so strange." Louis shook his head as Harry pulled into the parking lot of the small medical clinic.

The two exited the car and walked towards the building, holding hands of course. When they entered the building, Louis went to the waiting room and sat down while Harry spoke with the receptionist, they had become friends over the past few months that the doctors started to see Louis.

"How has he been love?" The woman, Cassidy, asked him. "I'm really worried about him, his memory is getting better which kind of confuses me because every doctor we've ever spoken to has told us there isn't a solution." Harry shook his head, looking at Louis who was flipping through a magazine. "Louis is a special case, Dr. Harin has been a specialist in this type of amnesia for almost twenty years and she's never seen a case like Louis, I think he can get his memory back." Harry smiled just as Dr. Harin came out and called Louis into her office.

Harry and Louis walked into the office behind the doctor, who shut the door behind them. "Okay Louis, have a seat on the exam table." The boy nodded and sat down, scrunching up his face at the crinkling sound the paper made. "Okay, so as both of you know, Louis you suffer from anterograde amnesia which means you are unable to create new memories after the accident when you were eight years old." Louis nodded, looking towards Harry. "So Louis, can you tell me what you remember from that day." Harry grabbed the boys hand.

"I was sitting in my room and my dad was drinking like he usually was, and he said he had to go to the grocery store so I went with him and he ran a red light. Someone crashed into the passenger side of the car, since I was sitting there I should've died but I didn't, and now i'm here." Harry smiled at the boy, brushing some of his hair out of his face. "Okay Louis, I'm going to give you a maze here and a pen for you to complete okay? do you remember ever seeing this before?" Louis took the maze and looked at it, shaking his head as he didn't recall seeing it before, however he was wrong, he was given the maze every month and even though he didn't remember it, he did better every time.

Dr. Harin led Harry outside to speak with him about his boyfriend. "He's for sure getting better, Harry. Everytime I ask about the accident there's more details, that isn't much but you say he's starting to remember random little things right?" Harry nodded. "I've been moving things around the house and telling him where they were too see if he'd remember and when we were leaving to come here he remembered where I put my car keys." The doctor smiled at Harry and wrote what he told her in her notebook, she had an entire notebook dedicated to Louis, she had never met an anterograde amnesiac quite like him. To her, Louis was a miracle. "I'm positive, he will get better."

-

Harry and Louis sat in the office, waiting for the doctor to come back and tell them the results for the test when a nurse walked into the room, looking frantic. "You two are free to leave now, but we need you to come back here tomorrow at the same time, we need to run some more tests." Harry furrowed his eyebrows but nodded anyway and stood up, leading Louis from the room.

The two exited the clinic and walked out to the car, Louis had almost instantly forgot what had happened while Harry was worried sick, what if something was wrong with Louis? They got in the car, Harry started it up and rolled down the windows while Louis stared blankly at him. "Babe?" Louis said quietly. "Yes love?" Harry asked, driving out of the parking lot. "Can we go get food? I'm starving." Harry simply nodded, making them fall into a comfortable silence.

-

Harry was the first to walk into their apartment, Louis following close behind with their bags of food from Taco Bell, Louis' favorite. The boy sat the food on the counter and Harry came to separate it, since Louis had no memory of what they ordered. Harry handed Louis his fries and his burrito before taking his own food from the bag and going to sit on the couch, with Louis following close behind. "Do you wanna watch a movie?" Louis nodded, taking a small bite of his burrito and cuddling into Harrys side. Harry laughed, turning on netflix and searching for a movie. "Do you wanna watch horror?" Harry asked, turning away from the screen to look at Louis. The boy just shrugged. "You pick." Harry smiled at his adorable face and turned back to the screen, finally deciding on The Purge.

The boys sat on the couch eating their food and watching various horror movies until they eventually fell asleep on the couch, Louis laying in Harrys arms. Yeah, It was a good night.


	4. Three

As soon as they arrived at the clinic, Harry and Louis were rushed into an office in the back of the building, the two were instructed to sit on the chairs in front of the desk while the nurse went and got the doctor. Harry held tightly onto Louis' hand as they waited.

Dr. Harin entered the room, sitting down at her desk. "Harry, we took an x-ray, the part of his brain that holds memories, the hippocampus, was underdeveloped and damaged but as you can see in our most recent x-ray, as opposed to our last which was six months ago." She pulled two photos from the folder and handed them to Harry. "It has changed significantly and is extremely similar to that of someone without amnesia." Harry examined the two photographs, noticing the extreme difference between them. "Does this mean I'm gonna get better?" The doctor smiled sweetly at him. "Yes Lou, you're gonna get better."

-

Hours later, Harry found himself carrying his small boyfriend out of the clinic and placing him in the passenger seat of their car. Harry yawned as he walked to the other side of the car and got in. "Do you wanna get some food or do you wanna just go home love?" Harry asked Louis as he started the car. "We need to go grocery shopping babe." Louis put his seatbelt on too and Harry nodded, starting his drive towards their preferred grocery store.

As Harry pulled into the parking lot, Louis noticed Liam standing by the doors of the shop and gets out to go talk to him as soon as they're parked, with Harry following behind him. "Hey guys!" Liam smiled as he saw them approaching. "Hey, is Zayn here?" Harry asked, wrapping an arm around Louis. "Yeah he's inside, I'm waiting because its cold in there and he only needed to get peanut butter so." Louis smiled up at Liam and Harry. "We were gonna have Zayn's parents over for dinner tomorrow night but they canceled, do you guys maybe wanna come." Harry looked to Louis and he nodded. "Yeah we don't have any plans." He answered just as Zayn came out and after a small conversation, Zayn and Liam decided to go home and let Harry and Louis do their shopping.

-

Once they had gotten home, Harry put away the food while Louis played on his boyfriends phone. "Harry?" Louis turned around and looked at his boyfriend. "Yes baby?" Harry asked, putting away the poptarts. "Can we cuddle? Once you're done with the food." Harry nodded. "Yeah, I'm almost done." Louis smiled and continued messing with Harrys phone as he put away the last of the groceries. Harry wrapped his arms around Louis from behind after he'd finished putting the food away. "You're so pretty." He whispered in Louis' ear, lifting the boy into his arms. "I love you." Harry carried Louis into their bedroom, softly laying him down on the mattress. Louis laughed, connecting their lips. Harry pulled back and started to play with Louis' hair. "I love you more."

-  
A/N  
IM SO SORRY ITS SHORT I HAD WRITERS BLOCK FFS DONT HATE ME


	5. Four

(One Month Later)  
"Harry do I have to go?" Louis whined, dreading the amnesia support group that Harry and Dr. Herin were making him attend. "Yes baby you have to, it'll help you a lot." Louis rolled his eyes, leaving the lobby of the apartment building with Harry. "But babe, I don't wanna talk about my problems to a bunch of people who don't actually give any fucks about me like at all." Harry ignored his protests and walked out to the car with his annoyed boyfriend following behind with his tiny arms crossed.

The couple got into their car, Louis slammed his door mostly out of annoyance. "Louis, babe this is gonna help you get better and give you people to talk to who understand, okay? This is for your own good." Louis huffed, not believing anything that Harry said. "I don't care, it's not like they care. They're only there for themselves." The boy mumbled, earning an eye roll from his boyfriend. Harry started the car and began the drive to the small church that the support group was held in.

As soon as they arrived, Louis wanted to leave, he could tell he would just not fit in with the type of people at that place. "Please try to make friends and open up a little baby, I'll be back to get you at six." Louis nodded and got out of the car, almost instantly forgetting what Harry had said to him, though he was forgetting a lot less thing, some stuff still just seemed to slip away from him. Harry drove off and Louis entered the building, looking around for the right room. He turned down a long corridor and began walking, coming to a stop in front of a door that said 'Amnesia support group' on the door. The boy entered the room, smiling slightly at the people who were already there and going to sit down in the circle of chairs. "Hello, you must be Louis? I'm Dr. Paul." Louis nodded, giving nothing but a small smile. "Okay, I think we should go around the circle and introduce ourselves. Allisha, why don't you start?" It was a command more than a question however the small blonde woman next to Dr. Paul stood up and began talking.

"My name is Allisha Beran, I'm twenty four and I have retrograde amnesia after an operation to remove a brain tumor went wrong when I was eighteen years old." She sat back down and they continued around the circle.

"My name is Brian Graham, I'm sixteen and I have retrograde amnesia from an addiction to alcohol starting when I was around twelve or thirteen."

"So um, I'm Ryan Surman, I'm thirty two and I have anterograde amnesia and well, I don't remember enough to tell you about my life."

And then they got to Louis, he shyly stood up and took a small breath. "Hi, my name is Louis Tomlinson and I suffer from short term memory loss."

-

Louis let out a sigh of relief when Dr. Paul dismissed them all from the group, practically running from the room. Louis rushed down the long corridor, he probably looked quite odd but honestly, he didn't care, he just wanted to go home and cry. He left the building, almost immediately seeing Harrys car and running towards it. He got in, letting out a loud groan. "So I'll take that as you hated it and you don't ever wanna come back." Louis nodded. "Spot on, now take me home I'm hungry." Harry chuckled and leaned over the center console, pressing a soft kiss to his boyfriends cheek. "Seatbelt baby." He whispered in Louis' ear before slowly pulling away. Louis rolled his eyes but buckled his seatbelt anyway. "You're a dork." Louis giggled. "But you love me." Harry smiled and started the car, driving away from the church.

"Harry, sometimes I feel like I won't get better. Like ever, the people in the group all pretty much say amnesia is incurable and so have most of the doctors we've seen so why do we keep trying, why don't we just give up?" Harry shook his head. "We can't give up, the fact that you remembered what they said, the fact that you remembered where I put my car keys yesterday. Louis William Tomlinson you are living and breathing proof that you can get better, amnesia can be cured and you, baby you are fucking proof of that." Louis was taken aback by Harrys speech, mostly because he said the entire thing without taking his eyes off the road for even a second. "I love you so much."

-

Louis practically skipped into the apartment, Harry behind him laughing uncontrollably at the boy. "You're such an idiot." Harry laughed, shutting the apartment door and locking it. "Hazzabear I'm hungry." Louis smiled, looking towards his boyfriend. "Okay babe, what do you want?" Harry shrugged his sweater off, throwing it onto the back of a stool. "Lets make spaghetti!" Louis squeaked, running into the kitchen to find the noodles. "Alright alright chicken little chill." Harry laughed loudly, following his tiny, now flustered boyfriend into the kitchen. "Don't call me little." Louis glared, placing the box of spaghetti noodles on the counter. "Okay I won't. Tiny." Louis looked up with an annoyed expression on his face. "You my friend are a twat!" Louis yelled, throwing his hands up. "Oh, ouch, getting friend zoned by your own boyfriend." Harry stifled a laugh, knowing he was pissing Louis off. "Shut up." Louis whined, turning around to face Harry. "Okay okay, I'm sorry baby." Harry pressed his lips to Louis', wrapping his strong arms around the boys waist. Louis pulled back slowly. "Harry, the thing is that I'd love to have sex with you but I'm hungry." Harry just laughed and started to gather the rest of the items needed for their pasta.

Once they had finished the pasta, and made a mess of the kitchen, they sat on their couch, watching old episodes of Pretty Little Liars on netflix. "I don't fucking get why this has to be so confusing, like how fucking many times has Toby been A?" Louis laughed at his boyfriend ridiculous comments. "To be about a thousand percent honest, I don't remember what we're watching." Harry smiled, laughing slightly and ruffling Louis' hair. "I love you, so much." Louis laid his head on Harrys chest. "I love you, thank you for loving a mess like me."


	6. Five

Louis started out the window as Harry once again drove him to the support group, Louis pulled his sleeves down over his hands. "Are you okay Louis?" The boy shook his head. "What's wrong babe?" Harry inquired, putting his hand on Louis' leg. "I hate this support group. It's useless for me and it just isn't helping." Harry sighed. "You've only gone twice, it obviously hasn't done anything yet." Louis rolled his eyes and pushed Harrys hand off his thigh. "Hey, sweater paws, perk up." Louis smiled slightly and grabbed Harrys hand as they pulled into the parking lot. "I love you, make friends, don't murder anyone." Louis laughed as Harry parked the car. The boy leaned over the center console and kissed Louis' cheek. "I love you."

Louis got out of the car and entered the building, walking down the large hallway to the room. He opened the door, trying to ignore everyones stares and he sits down in the circle, crossing his small arms. "Welcome back Louis." Dr. Paul smiled at him, Louis, however just nodded and avoided eye contact. "Alright guys," The doctor continued. "Today we are going t-" He was interrupted by the door opening and a tall, African-American man led a small blonde boy into the room.

The unnamed man outstretched his hand towards Dr. Paul. "Hi, doctor, I'm Rick. We spoke on the phone. sorry to get him here a bit late, we got lost on the way here." Rick said, ruffling the small blonde boys hair. The doctor shook the his hand. "Hello Rick, so this must be Niall?" He smiled at the boy. "Yep, that's me." Louis smiled slightly, you could hear the Irish in the boys voice. "Alright, I'm gonna have you take a seat next to Louis over here." Dr. Paul led Niall over to the empty chair placed next to Louis. He smiled at Louis, being up close Louis could tell his hair was dyed blonde, it was quite obvious in fact with how prominent his brown roots were.

"So Niall, why don't you tell the group a bit about who you are?" The doctor asked, well, more like told him because he really didn't have a choice judging by Dr. Paul's face as he said it. "Oh, well my name's Niall Horan and I just kinda developed short term memory loss last year so I couldn't say it's taken over my life yet but it's definitely been hard and really other than that I'm okay." Louis fiddled with his thumbs as he listened to the fake blonde talk while starting to wish he could go home. Home was the only place he'd been enough to really know where everything was and know that he was fine.

Louis zoned out during the entire group meeting until four o'clock when the group ended and he was free to go back to his Harry. As he was walking outside to wait for his boyfriend, the Irish boy walked towards him. "Hi, you're Louis right?" Louis nodded hesitantly at him, furrowing his eyebrows a bit. "How did you remember that?" Niall smiled slightly, showing his clean, straight teeth. "I find that if I repeat things in my head over and over after I hear it then it tends to stick more often than not." Louis nodded. "So, whats your story?" Niall asked, making the slightly shorter boy laugh. "What makes ya think you're entitled to my life story Mr. Horan?" Niall laughed loudly. "You interest me Louis." Louis ran a hand through his hair.

"My dad was addicted to cocaine, drove high one day with me in the back of his car. I almost died, my dad's dead though. I don't remember his funeral but even if he lived he wouldn't remember what the fuck he was thinking when he decided to take his son to school right after snorting." Niall nodded, looking to his feet.

"Hey baby." Louis heard an unfamiliar voice say and he looked towards Niall, seeing the man who brought him into the group that morning placing a small kiss on the Irish boys lips. Louis rolled his eyes but smiled anyway because it was cute in that annoying PDA couple way.

Louis smiled wider when he saw Harry's car pull into the lot. He waved at Harry through the window and motioned for him to come out of the car. He did, walking towards Louis and wrapping him in a hug. "Hello, gorgeous." Louis giggled into the crook of Harry's neck. They pulled away and Harry looked over at Rick and Niall. He cleared his throat, making both look at him. "Hi, I'm Harry."


	7. Six

Louis groaned loudly when the alarm went off at eleven a.m, the hedgehog looking boy liked his sleep and this alarm was not doing it for him. He hit Harry on the chest. "Babeee." He whined. "Turn your fucking alarm off." He pulled a pillow over his face as he felt Harry get off the bed. "Babybear, get up. We're going out." Louis groaned even louder. "What the fuck why." The boy huffed. "Because we need more friends and you need someone you can relate to." Louis pulled the pillow off his face and looked at his boyfriend, narrowing his adorable blue eyes. "What does this mean?" Harry smiled, pulling freshly cleaned shirt over his head. "I made an arrangement with Niall and Rick." Louis raised a brow as Harry climbed on top of him. "Who?" Harry laughed again and briefly connected his lips with Louis'. "You'll see, now get up."

"I hope you know I am not doing this because I want to, I am doing this because you forced me to wake up." Harry shook his head and focused on the road, driving to the  
cafe they'd agreed to meet at. "If I hate whoever we're going to see you don't get to fuck me later." Louis glared jokingly. "I may not be allowed to fuck you but I can't uneat your ass." Harry laughed loudly as Louis shook his head.

Harry lead Louis (A very unwilling Louis) into the small cafe and to a table that two other men were sitting at, that Louis almost instantly remembered. "Nice, I rant to my lovely boyfriend about how I hate group, so he brings me to hang out with someone from group. Excellent, splendid." Niall laughed. "And how'd you remember me, my British pal?" Louis smirked while sitting down. "An ugly face like yours isn't hard to forget, my Irish companion." Harry and Rick shared a knowing glance, these two were gonna be friends.

The fun ended when someone sent Harry over a drink, Louis got annoyed as Harry looked over to the man who'd sent it over. Harry abruptly stood up and went to go speak to the man. The two shared a hug in which the strangers hand wandered way too far down for Louis' liking, he'd had enough. Louis stood up, not even saying goodbye and tossed a twenty on the table to cover his and Harrys meals before grabbing Harrys arm and leading him out of the cafe, no words exchanged between the two. Louis was livid.

By the end of the meeting, Louis and Harry were certainly not on the best of terms. "Who was that guy?" Louis asked possessively, glaring at Harry. "Can you not do this Louis? I'm not in the mood." Louis slammed his tiny hands down. "He grabbed your fucking ass Harry! I wanna know who it was!" Harry groaned, not sparing a glance in Louis' direction. "He was my ex alright! Are you fuckin' happy now?" Louis' glare hardened. "Give me your phone." Harry scoffed at the demand. "Do you seriously not fucking trust me? Are you kidding me Louis?" Harry pulled into their apartments parking lot.

"Seriously Louis, drop it." Harry slammed the door behind him and hung the keys by the door, all while the glare of his small, completely not threatening boyfriend glared at him from his perch on the kid then counter. "Maybe I'll drop you along the way as well." Harry laughed, he actually laughed, quite loudly at that. "Honey, you can't leave me. You can't live without me."


	8. Seven

(I don't mean to be cringy but please listen to look after you by the fray on fucking repeat for the rest of the story starting NOW)

Louis awoke the next morning to roses placed on his side table, white roses. His favorite. And a smiling Harry holding a plate of breakfast for him. "What's this?" The boy asked tiredly, wiping his eyes with his small fists. "Well, I wanted to tell you that I'm sorry but I figured 'Sorry' wouldn't be good enough so I put this together for you. I love you, my Lou." He smiled at his lover. "Thank you Hazza, I love you too and I'm sorry as well." He sat up in bed, kissing Harry softly.

The couple had decided to stay in that night, drinking and playing board games, cuddling and kissing each other, whispering small I love you's to each other. "Harry?" Louis said in a hushed voice as his boyfriend moved his monopoly piece across the bored (passing go and collecting two hundred dollars because bae gettin money) "Yes angel?" Harry looked over his shoulder at his adorable boyfriend. "Make love to me"

Within seconds, Louis was being carried to their bedroom my Harry, whom was pressing small and very rushes kisses onto his boyfriends neck and face. "I love you so much baby." Harry whispered as he laid the tiny man down on the bed. "Show me then, Hazza." Harry licked his lips, quickly discarding his pants and shirt before climbing onto Louis, straddling his waist. "Woah there mister Styles, slow down a bit, ay?" Louis giggled, pulling his shirt slowly over his head. "Go slowly, babe" Louis whispered, leaning up to connect his lips with Harry's.

"Louis Tomlinson I am so fucking in love with you, you're so fucking hot." Harry rubbed his hands along the boys sides. Louis started laughing immediately. "What so funny?" Harry half smiled, having to talk over Louis giggles. "Heart eyes mother fucker." Louis rushed out before laughing loudly again. "You make no sense baby, none at all."

From the minutes Harry entered him, Louis was in pure bliss. "F-fuck!" He panted from underneath Harry. "I love you so goddamn much baby boy." Harry moaned, thrusting his hips harder, Louis let out a small whine, throwing his hands above his head. "Shit!" Louis yelped as Harry grabbed onto the headboard and started increasing his speed.

"Fuck! Harry I'm gonna cum." Louis covered his face with his hands as thick spurts of the sticky liquid exited his cock and shot all over his and Harry's chests. Not long after Harry spilled into the condom, collapsing ontop of Louis. "I love you."

"I love you." Was the last thing Harry said to Louis before he lost all control of the car. It was a week later, dark outside and after a night of drinking, Harry got in the car. This is where Louis' bad memory got them into a horrific situation. Louis didn't remember Harry drinking. Louis didn't object to Harry driving home. Louis didn't know any better. It was Harry's irresponsible decisions that landed him ten feet away from the car, flown out through the sunroof, a result of not wearing his seat belt. Harry was awake, not able to scream for help, the pain was unbearable. Louis, was unconscious. When Harry slammed on the breaks, Louis smacked his head on the dash and he hadn't woken up since. Harry had floored his breaks after driving double the speed limit down the highway. Whats worse? He hit them in the middle of an intersection. A car slammed into the side of theirs. The last thing Harry could hear was distant sirens, and all he could hope was that they would save Louis first, before it all went fuzzy.

"He thinks that faith might be dead, nothing kills a man faster than his own head"


	9. Eight (1)

(good end)

If Louis had known then what he knew now, he would never have gotten in that car and risked his life.

It had been three months since he'd opened his eyes, three months since he had seen another human being, and three months since he had seen Harry, which was the first thing on his mind.

He woke up to a doctor standing over him, messing with the IV in his arm, not noticing his suddenly conscious state until he heard the heart monitor speed up, as that wasn't normal, he immediately looked at Louis. His eyes were wide, his face pale. "Oh my god." The doctor whispered, dropping his tools and running to grab the staff he needed to run his tests.

After finally settling into a new room, the doctor came to ask him some questions to see what he remembered about the accident.

"Okay so Louis, I am aware of your amnesia and I understand you won't remember most things but is there anything you recall from the night of the accident?" Louis nodded, digging deep into his memory until he realized. His memory. "Oh my god. Doctor! I remember everything, holy shit, holy fucking shit I remember! Wait where's Harry? Is Harry okay? He got hurt oh no shit where is he?!" Louis went into full panic mode until the door opened, revealing Harry. He was okay.

"Harry!" Louis nearly shouted as Harry engulfed him into a massive bear hug. "Hazza babe I remember everything, like seriously I remember." Harry pressed a kiss to his lips to silence him. "Is that that the nice way of telling me to shut up?" Harry smiled and chuckled a little. "If you remember everything, do you remember that ring you stumbled across in our room that day." Louis looked confused for a minute until Harry pulled a box from his pocket.

"Mr. Louis William Tomlinson, I love you to the moon and back baby in fact I'd have a better chance of draining all the oceans with a straw than getting you to understand how much I actually love you and I am so sorry for getting in that car that night but I swear to god I will love you forever if you will do me the honour of becoming a Styles?" Louis just nodded, he nodded because he couldn't get the words out, he nodded because after all these years of suffering and pain and hardships he was free. Louis nodded because he was sobbing to hard to speak.

"I guess I can be your Dory forever now."


	10. Eight (2)

(bad end)

If Louis had known then what he knew now, he would never have gotten in that car and risked his life.

It had been three months since he'd opened his eyes, three months since he had seen another human being, and three months since he had seen Harry, which was the first thing on his mind.

He woke up to a doctor standing over him, messing with the IV in his arm, not noticing his suddenly conscious state until he heard the heart monitor speed up, as that wasn't normal, he immediately looked at Louis. His eyes were wide, his face pale. "Oh my god." The doctor whispered, dropping his tools and running to grab the staff he needed to run his tests.

After finally settling into a new room, the doctor came to ask him some questions to see what he remembered about the accident.

"Okay so Louis, I am aware of your amnesia and I understand you won't remember most things but is there anything you recall from the night of the accident?" Louis nodded, digging deep into his memory until he realized. His memory. "Oh my god. Doctor! I remember everything, holy shit, holy fucking shit I remember! Wait where's Harry? Is Harry okay? He got hurt oh no shit where is he?!" Louis went into full panic mode when he noticed the doctor avoiding eye contact and his uncomfortable body language. "He's gone. Isn't he?" The doctor just nods. "I'm sorry Louis, I'll give you a minute." Louis didn't need a minute. He needed Harry.

For weeks after, Louis routine was the same. Wake up, cry, eat cry, shower, cry, read, cry himself to sleep, repeat. It was an unbreakable cycle. No matter how many people came to the apartment to comfort him, he told them to fuck off. That he didn't want visitors. He wanted to be alone with Harry.

He missed so much. He missed Harry's funeral. He couldn't believe when they told him that. They hurried the love of his life without him even there. It wasn't fair.

Louis hasn't gone to the gravesite. He didn't want to believe it. He wished that he at least hadn't gotten his memory back so he didn't have to grieve. He didn't need to cry. But he did. No matter how much he tried to shake the feeling of wanting to go home he could. Even if he stayed all day in the apartment because home was where Harry was and Harry was gone.

It wasn't fair at all. Louis now knew Harry had plans to propose that night. He'd remembered the ring he found in Harry's jacket pocket that night before they left while he was looking for keys. He never got to see the ring, even wear it. He wanted to be Mr. Styles more than he craved air.

It had been almost a year of suffering, of telling everyone to just fuck off, of wanting to be alone but also wanting to go home to his Harry even though he couldn't when Louis finally, snapped. He stood in his bathroom, nine expired advil tablets lay in his left hand, an open bottle of watched in the right one.

Louis glanced in the mirror at his disgruntled appearance for a final time, his chapped lips in desperate need of some balm, his hair, ratty and unbrushed, the bags under his now dull and lifeless eyes, from lack of sleep of course. He nodded. "Do it Louis, you can be with Harry forever." He told himself before giving one last nod and throwing the pills in his !mouth, swallowing them with a massive gulp of water.

"I guess I can be your Dory forever now."


	11. Epilogue

No matter how you interoperate what happened here, Louis memory coming back was a miracle, Louis himself, was Harry's miracle, and no matter how you read their story, Louis got to be Harry's Dory, forever.


End file.
